Just let kids be...!!

I read an article recently (“Is it OK to let our kids settle for ‘good enough’?” from modernmom.com) that really made me think. The article discusses the idea of our children ‘specialising’ in the activities that they love and it raises the question of what to do (or not do) when kids are just having fun doing different activities and have not yet found their ‘thing’ if they ever find their ‘thing’!

It got me thinking about my kids and what they enjoy doing. Have they found their thing? I’m not sure but then again I think they are too young yet to have found their ‘thing’. Also what does it actually mean, having your ‘thing’?? Is a child’s or adult’s ‘thing’ something they excel at? are passionate about? or is it something they just really enjoy?

My kids do have many things that they are already interested in and enjoy. My oldest loves art and crafts and my middle child likes sport (he is not quite at love!) and my youngest well she is only 2yrs so anything that involves running around and making a mess or a commotion is her thing!

I don’t see myself as a pushy mother and I am not competitive (unlike my husband!) however I do get pulled in, on the odd occasion I may add, to analysing what other kids are doing, should my kids be doing that also and how good some kids are at certain things and if I am honest I do wonder…..

This is when I stop myself and have a reality check! I do not agree and do not like comparing children, they are individuals and should be treated as such. I hope that I will always be the supportive mammy not the pushy over involved mammy. I want to encourage my kids to experience different things and to at least give it a go and see what they think about an activity or experience. If they don’t like it or don’t enjoy it then thats that!

Kids should be having fun and enjoying what they do. They should not be feeling stressed or pressured to be ‘the best’ at something. If they love something then yes they should be supported and encouraged and given lots of opportunities to follow their passion and excel in whatever it is they choose. However I also think it is important that we as parents aren’t too pushy or over involved in our kids ‘thing’ as it is their passion and not our’s.

I want to be the sort of mammy that is open and accepting and that just lets her kids be. I have enrolled my kids in various after school and club activities over the years and some they have liked and some they have dropped out of. This is fine as I want them to have the opportunity to experience lots of various activities and for them to decide what they like and don’t like, not me.

I agree with this article when it states the we tend to focus too much on the outcomes, we need to focus on the experience and how the activity is contributing to our kids lives.. Is it enriching their lives? Are they enjoying it?

Will my kids be gifted or excel at something? Will they find their thing? I don’t know and really it does not matter. What does matter is that they are enjoying life and all they do, that they are happy and having fun and having lots of laughs and giggles along the way… because not just sometimes but all the time, being good enough is good enough!!